ok.. 2 months later.. I knoooow...
I have made this deal with my sister to go jogging 3 times a week - I feel so proud to be "back on track" with the training, at least.. The food part has not been going so well. A lot of stress lately, and the fact that I've moved far away from someone I loved is kinda depressing:( I'm gonna be honest with you, I've been living on pizza and candies for awhile.. and I'll tell you, it shows! The latest video I put on my channel (23th august) is actually in the "pizza period".. But I feel worse now. I got this loose ugly, hanging belly.. It's to cry for:'( I hate myself for letting so much food in, and no exercise. It destroys me, not only my body, but my mind too..
So.. since I'm going back to "my love" in Xmas/New Year I've decided that I'll deal with this for real, once in for all!
Can't keep going up and down!
You know, sometimes I can be this gothic little bitch. Fall down in these black holes and hurt myself.. I do it cuz I hate myself, my life and the situation. I find myself falling back in this holes every now and then. Started when I was like 12 years old..:S OK, I'm not gonna make you feel sorry for me, but that's just how it is.
So, I've catched up with the traing - feels good! I had an "exercise period" in march-april this year, but somehow it always stops, and I let myself be fat. Not fear.
I'll be making more videos soon and put on my Channel at YT (prettythin2be). Just gotta catch up with my diet first. No use to make videos if I'm only fatter than in the previous video, if you know what I mean?
Stay in touch!<3
Xoxo
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